HUE By Sarah Davidson

Madison, Milwaukee Wedding Planner

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Destination Weddings: Is it for You? (Throwback)

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Hey friends!

May has been INSANE in the land of HUE, as we maneuver through our local area finally reopening post-Covid, engage in tons of cool project-based work, and in general launch into our busy season. Due to all of that, I’m taking the opportunity to again throwback on today’s blog to a topic near and dear to my heart. 

There’s a few reasons I chose this one:

  1. I’m headed down right this moment to my friend’s destination wedding in the Dominican Republic <3
  2. Kevin and I celebrated our 8 year anniversary this week of our own destination wedding <3

Considering nuptials outside the US of A? Read on to learn more about if it’s right for you!

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It was January 2012 and I was on a trip to San Diego. My boyfriend (now husband) and I were strolling along the beach with the iconic Hotel del Coronado background, and I remember that being the first moment that having a destination wedding crossed my mind. I couldn’t help but be entranced by crashing waves, warm temperatures, and walking alongside the guy I was fairly certain I would end up with. I was hooked, and from there knew that one day I would get married on a beach.

It definitely took some convincing and was not a decision we made lightly. Destination weddings can be just as expensive (if not more) than a traditional wedding and no matter how you approach it, you’re immediately putting a lot of pressure on your guests. Traveling is as natural as breathing in both of our families, so luckily both sets of parents were immediately on board. There were many others to consider though – grandparents who could not travel easily, and friends who didn’t have a ton of disposable income to drop on a big trip. In the end, we decided to still do the destination and ended up with about 25 people at the beautiful El Dorado Royale, but also had a full-blown traditional reception at home, so we were able to celebrate with everyone that we loved.

There are hundreds of other “destinations” out there besides the beach. My cousin is getting married this year on a cruise ship through the Bahamas. My colleagues have clients getting married at castles in Ireland. And hey, Vegas is just as classic as it ever was. My point is, if you’re not sure about the traditional wedding setting, you’ve got options!

Some ways to help control the costs for your guests is to research travel deals, offer various activities they can say yes and no to, and make a no gifts policy. And know in the end that you need to be a very understanding host if some guests can’t swing it, but also know the people that matter will be there. You will (hopefully) only have one wedding in your life, and you have the right to do it how you want.

If this something you are considering, I would recommend putting thought into the following areas before booking:

  • Why do you want a destination wedding? Are you just not happy with your available options, or are you truly excited about this one? Do you think it will be cheaper? (Because it’s usually not). For all the reasons listed above and more, you want to make sure you’re choosing this for the right reasons. No matter how you go about it, there are bound to be some hurt feelings from those who either cannot partake or are not invited, so make sure you are prepared to have conversations with them as needed.
  • How do you feel about wedding planning? Destination weddings attract many people at first because they think it will be much easier to plan, but unless it’s just the two of you leaving to elope, that’s probably not the case. There are just as many, if not more, logistics to coordinate and the potential for higher stress levels. I would highly recommend considering hiring a travel agent or wedding planner that works specifically in the destination wedding market, or discussing with your chosen venue their available staffing and options.
  • How meaningful is the actual ceremony to you? Depending on your destination, you might have to jump through a lot of hopes to obtain a legitimate marriage license. Many locations outside of the USA actually recommend that couples even get legally married at a courthouse before traveling, leaving the on-site ceremony to be purely symbolic.

I wouldn’t change anything about our wedding and will always recommend considering destination weddings to those with whom it could be a good fit. At the end of the day, no matter where you get married and no matter who is there, it will be the best day of your life. Make sure it is the best reflection of YOU that it can be!

Getting Married Before Your “Wedding” – Yay or Nay?

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I’m going to start this week by sharing a lesson of how I became Sarah Davidson. My husband and I were legally married in May of 2013 at a resort in Mexico with a ceremony and dinner of about 25 people. In November of that year, we threw an entire additional wedding in our hometown of Madison, Wisconsin. This included a second ceremony so we could celebrate with all those who weren’t able to attend the first one.

Getting legally married in Mexico was a pain in the butt. We had to provide all sorts of documentation we weren’t confident in, get blood tests done on-site, and have a local judge at the ceremony to legally pronounce us after our pastor had finished. Many people suggested just getting married at the courthouse ahead of time, but we knew we were going to have a ceremony in November as well, and the idea of going through it three times seemed a bit overwhelming. We’re all good now– with a marriage license in Spanish to prove it!

The reason that I wanted to share this experience is because I have seen it happen all the time! Reasons for getting married “early” or before your official celebration can include travel reasons like ours, legal reasons such as immigration or adoption, religious reasons, or just wanting to keep things personal and intimate. Whatever you decide the process to be, it’s completely up to you.

There may be people who scoff about how they are not attending your “real” wedding. Feel free to explain your reasoning if you want, or just ignore it and mention how excited you are to still celebrate with them when the party rolls around. You’ll find that the second “big day” is just as meaningful as the first, and you’ll probably even feel a lot less nervous than you would having everything rolled together in one day. Everyone still gets to dress up, food and booze will be served, and entertainment will be had.. which are all the main events that your guests care about anyways!

The ultimate goal of this post is to scream “You do you!” As I’ve said many times, the people that matter will support you and those w won’t don’t matter. Happy planning!

Featured Photo: Twig & Olive